Dogjenken is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, sapient grasshopper.

Dogjenken created everything that exists eight million years ago.

If you believe in Dogjenken, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Dogjenken, he will turn you into a goat.

Dogjenken's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Dogjenken's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no geese in a building before entering it.

2. Never sit in holy places.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Never eat green fruit.