Bastmegster is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, humane octopus.

Bastmegster created the planet Saturn eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bastmegster, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bastmegster, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Bastmegster's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Bastmegster's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Bastmegster.

2. Feed all hungry sharks.

3. Do not laugh in public.

4. Never talk about foxes.

5. Do not chop down trees.