Tafwodbag is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, blissful wyvern.

Tafwodbag created a strange quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Tafwodbag, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tafwodbag, it will turn you into a worm.

Tafwodbag's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Tafwodbag's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Tafwodbag five times a day.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Do not eat parsnips.