Hadgofben is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, narcissistic owl.

Hadgofben created the Andromeda Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hadgofben, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Hadgofben, it will turn you into a sheep.

Hadgofben's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Hadgofben's Holy Commandments

1. Hadgofben must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Always help rats in need.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Erect a large silver sculpture of Hadgofben on top of all buildings.