Baststiksan is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, conceited snail.

Baststiksan created the Sun five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Baststiksan, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Baststiksan, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Baststiksan's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Baststiksan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Always wear brown.

3. Never write about moons.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not stand on grass.