Timjenbum is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, cheerful naga.

Timjenbum created the planet Saturn eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Timjenbum, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Timjenbum, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Timjenbum's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Timjenbum's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

3. Never skip in holy places.

4. Do not trade with those who eat spinach.

5. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.