Zanjadkannurl Bogpanmip is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, cheerful newt.

Zanjadkannurl Bogpanmip created parasitic wasps two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zanjadkannurl Bogpanmip, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Zanjadkannurl Bogpanmip, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Zanjadkannurl Bogpanmip's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Zanjadkannurl Bogpanmip's Holy Commandments

1. Zanjadkannurl Bogpanmip must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Zanjadkannurl Bogpanmip.

4. Worship no other gods but Zanjadkannurl Bogpanmip.

5. Never go into violet rooms.