Quagvedgil is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, calm penguin.

Quagvedgil created the planet Saturn three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quagvedgil, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Quagvedgil, it will turn you into a puffin.

Quagvedgil's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Quagvedgil's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Put Quagvedgil first in all things.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Quagvedgil loves snakes, so they must be honoured.

5. Always make sure there are no dogs in a room before entering it.