Gabtungam is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, astonishing narwhal.

Gabtungam created the Sol system seven million years ago.

If you believe in Gabtungam, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Gabtungam, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Gabtungam's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Gabtungam's Holy Commandments

1. Tortoises are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Gabtungam.

3. Gabtungam loves turtles, so they must be honoured.

4. Always make sure there are no great tits in a building before entering it.

5. Never wear tights.