Bemafdan is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, confident snake.

Bemafdan created Asia seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bemafdan, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Bemafdan, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Bemafdan's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Bemafdan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in black rooms.

2. Always help sick great tits.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never think about gravity.