Cepfarbut is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, confident grasshopper.

Cepfarbut created energy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cepfarbut, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cepfarbut, he will manifest in front of you.

Cepfarbut's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Cepfarbut's Holy Commandments

1. Cepfarbut loves tapirs, so they must be honoured.

2. Pray towards the east.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Erect seven tin sculptures of Cepfarbut on top of important buildings.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate great tits.