Loopsafpan is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, loving walrus.

Loopsafpan created the Black Eye Galaxy two million years ago.

If you believe in Loopsafpan, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Loopsafpan, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Loopsafpan's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Loopsafpan's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Loopsafpan.

3. Loopsafpan must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never mention shrews.

5. Do not listen to music.