Waplunhan is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, temperamental mongoose.

Waplunhan created a photon nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Waplunhan, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Waplunhan, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Waplunhan's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Waplunhan's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from white seals, for they are unholy.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Never look in ponds.