Pangvollik Volgatbest is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, deceitful ferret.

Pangvollik Volgatbest created the Sombrero Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Pangvollik Volgatbest, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Pangvollik Volgatbest, it will destroy your home planet.

Pangvollik Volgatbest's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Pangvollik Volgatbest's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Pangvollik Volgatbest.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never think about the strong nuclear force.