Tikbifbabkemkapgartad is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, deceitful zebra.

Tikbifbabkemkapgartad created the Virgo Supercluster two years ago.

If you believe in Tikbifbabkemkapgartad, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Tikbifbabkemkapgartad, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Tikbifbabkemkapgartad's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Tikbifbabkemkapgartad's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Always wear pink.

4. Always make sure there are no turtles in a room before entering it.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tikbifbabkemkapgartad.