Nanort is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, stupid goat.

Nanort created dark matter two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nanort, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nanort, it will try to impress you with trees.

Nanort's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Nanort's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed aubergines to tortoises while wearing cyan jumpers.

2. Do not drink water in white rooms.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

4. Never skip near hamsters.

5. Manatees are not to be trusted.