Wodwigbet is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, annoying horse.

Wodwigbet created vertebrates seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wodwigbet, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Wodwigbet, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Wodwigbet's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Wodwigbet's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Wodwigbet.

2. Moths are not to be trusted.

3. Always help doves in need.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Wodwigbet loves hamsters, so they must be honoured.