Tonspagdib Bellanbet is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, grumpy goat.

Tonspagdib Bellanbet created time and space two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tonspagdib Bellanbet, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Tonspagdib Bellanbet, it will destroy your home solar system.

Tonspagdib Bellanbet's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Tonspagdib Bellanbet's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from yellow manatees for they are unholy.

2. Do not take Tonspagdib Bellanbet's name in vain.

3. Always help moths.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate doves.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.