Jatarmdub is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, tranquil snail.

Jatarmdub created tapeworms four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jatarmdub, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Jatarmdub, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Jatarmdub's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Jatarmdub's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Always treat dogs with great respect.

3. Always obey Jatarmdub's priests.

4. Never laugh in holy places.

5. Never bounce near mice.