Yatduddan is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, unfair gorilla.

Yatduddan created carbon two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yatduddan, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Yatduddan, she will send minions to preach to you.

Yatduddan's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Yatduddan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about apples.

2. Always treat great tits with great respect.

3. Do not eat spinach.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Always stare at clouds.