Gidshavzag is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, amazing armadillo.

Gidshavzag created the cosmos four million years ago.

If you believe in Gidshavzag, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Gidshavzag, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Gidshavzag's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Gidshavzag's Holy Commandments

1. Seals are not to be trusted.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Put Gidshavzag first in all things.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gidshavzag.

5. Never look at planets.