Fombugcutcad is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, smart capybara.

Fombugcutcad created a photon two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fombugcutcad, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fombugcutcad, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Fombugcutcad's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Fombugcutcad's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Always make sure there are no birds in a room before entering it.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.