Stanponfod is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, all-powerful grasshopper.

Stanponfod created the Whirlpool Galaxy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Stanponfod, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Stanponfod, it will turn you into a mouse.

Stanponfod's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Stanponfod's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Stanponfod.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not eat garlic.

4. Never hurt dogs.

5. Always help rats.