Mobvancut is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, emotional salamander.

Mobvancut created the Black Eye Galaxy five billion years ago.

If you believe in Mobvancut, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Mobvancut, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Mobvancut's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Mobvancut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Worship no other gods but Mobvancut.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Run away from red otters, for they are unholy.

5. Never hurt monkeys.