Begfosskik is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, unthinking seal.

Begfosskik created the solar system six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Begfosskik, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Begfosskik, she will be mildly annoyed.

Begfosskik's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Begfosskik's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate great tits.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Erect eight platinum sculptures of Begfosskik on top of important buildings.