Fenkonfas is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, witty newt.

Fenkonfas created Mount Everest five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fenkonfas, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Fenkonfas, it will remove you from existence.

Fenkonfas' most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Fenkonfas' Holy Commandments

1. Run away from indigo cats, for they are unholy.

2. Never talk about shrews.

3. Feed all hungry great tits.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate tortoises.

5. Never pour water over plants.