Zenzedhak is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, effective crocodile.

Zenzedhak created Asia three million years ago.

If you believe in Zenzedhak, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Zenzedhak, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Zenzedhak's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Zenzedhak's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about amino acids.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not speak about cucumbers.