Konpang is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, awesome weasel.

Konpang created the Sun two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Konpang, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Konpang, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Konpang's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Konpang's Holy Commandments

1. Always help eagles.

2. Retreat if three manatees approach from the west.

3. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Never talk about amino acids.