Xentifpib Betfenlen Fitruttflab is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, ruthless unicorn.

Xentifpib Betfenlen Fitruttflab created an up quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xentifpib Betfenlen Fitruttflab, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Xentifpib Betfenlen Fitruttflab, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Xentifpib Betfenlen Fitruttflab's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Xentifpib Betfenlen Fitruttflab's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not bounce in public.

3. Do not take Xentifpib Betfenlen Fitruttflab's name in vain.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Fast once a month.