Yarlyarbadladvonwat is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, intelligent scorpion.

Yarlyarbadladvonwat created a top quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Yarlyarbadladvonwat, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Yarlyarbadladvonwat, he will turn you into a rat.

Yarlyarbadladvonwat's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Yarlyarbadladvonwat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Do not bounce in public.

3. Never sit in the presence of frogs.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Yarlyarbadladvonwat loves great tits, so they must be honoured.