Omtveenkon is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, almighty dog.

Omtveenkon created energy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Omtveenkon, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Omtveenkon, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Omtveenkon's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Omtveenkon's Holy Commandments

1. Never run in holy places.

2. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

3. Never skip near monkeys.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Always make sure there are no frogs in a building before entering it.