Vadhanbum is a god.

It takes the form of a small, uncaring tortoise.

Vadhanbum created the Large Magellanic Cloud six billion years ago.

If you believe in Vadhanbum, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Vadhanbum, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Vadhanbum's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Vadhanbum's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Vadhanbum loves mice, so they must be respected.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Never paint your hands fawn.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.