Cannutttontabsid is a god.

It takes the form of a large, fast yak.

Cannutttontabsid created an up quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Cannutttontabsid, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Cannutttontabsid, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Cannutttontabsid's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Cannutttontabsid's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Rats are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Retreat if nine tapirs approach from the west.

4. Feed all hungry otters.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.