Motyattbud is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, awe-inspiring bat.

Motyattbud created a strange quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Motyattbud, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Motyattbud, it will turn you into a puffin.

Motyattbud's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Motyattbud's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Motyattbud must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never talk about nebulae.