Staftabcud is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, uncaring dragon.

Staftabcud created humankind seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Staftabcud, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Staftabcud, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Staftabcud's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Staftabcud's Holy Commandments

1. Staftabcud loves dogs, so they must be respected.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Staftabcud.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never wear boots.