Funvegcuthug is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, tranquil capybara.

Funvegcuthug created life two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Funvegcuthug, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Funvegcuthug, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Funvegcuthug's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Funvegcuthug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair purple.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not take Funvegcuthug's name in vain.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Do not drink alcohol.