Funhapfed is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, fast mole.

Funhapfed created an atom eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Funhapfed, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Funhapfed, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Funhapfed's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Funhapfed's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear hats.

2. Never feed onions to bats while wearing brown jumpers.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Funhapfed.

4. Pray towards the east.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.