Safpanquaf is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, impressive shark.

Safpanquaf created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Safpanquaf, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Safpanquaf, it will torture you forever.

Safpanquaf's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Safpanquaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never sing in the presence of aardvarks.

4. Pray towards the east.

5. Do not run in public.