Nurlmonbepkip is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, unjust bird.

Nurlmonbepkip created a quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Nurlmonbepkip, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Nurlmonbepkip, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Nurlmonbepkip's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Nurlmonbepkip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about figs.

2. Run away if eight voles approach from the east.

3. Nurlmonbepkip loves goats, so they must be honoured.

4. Never eat bananas.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.