Dogjamkik is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, prudent crane.

Dogjamkik created humanity five billion years ago.

If you believe in Dogjamkik, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Dogjamkik, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Dogjamkik's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Dogjamkik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your back.

2. Always look after injured aardvarks.

3. Retreat if nine ants approach from the west.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.