Fubjonmeg is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, calm mongoose.

Fubjonmeg created energy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Fubjonmeg, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fubjonmeg, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Fubjonmeg's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Fubjonmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate rats.

2. Do not hurt sheep.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate monkeys.

4. Do not speak about peas.

5. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Fubjonmeg on top of all buildings.