Bigdissarplarplid is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, unjust turtle.

Bigdissarplarplid created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Bigdissarplarplid, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bigdissarplarplid, he will turn you into a rock.

Bigdissarplarplid's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Bigdissarplarplid's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Do not eat bread.

3. Never look at asteroids.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Hide from black tapirs for they are unholy.