Nelhabbodyog is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, compassionate penguin.

Nelhabbodyog created snails four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nelhabbodyog, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Nelhabbodyog, it will laugh at you.

Nelhabbodyog's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Nelhabbodyog's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear skirts.

2. Never think ill of sick dogs.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate frogs.

4. Never go into pink rooms.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.