Gidmab is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, bad-tempered shrew.

Gidmab created a photon six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gidmab, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gidmab, he will turn you into a hamster.

Gidmab's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Gidmab's Holy Commandments

1. Eagles are not to be trusted.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Gidmab.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never wear indigo shorts.
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