Gumyarlig Belltigbug is a god.

He takes the form of a large, clever narwhal.

Gumyarlig Belltigbug created the Cigar Galaxy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Gumyarlig Belltigbug, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Gumyarlig Belltigbug, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Gumyarlig Belltigbug's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Gumyarlig Belltigbug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

2. Feed all hungry rats.

3. Worship no other gods but Gumyarlig Belltigbug.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Do not shave your back.