Artmobpan is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, proud seal.

Artmobpan created an up quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Artmobpan, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Artmobpan, she will jump up and down on your head.

Artmobpan's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Artmobpan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat carrots.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Always obey Artmobpan's priests.