Veenlinlarndim is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, passionate raven.

Veenlinlarndim created an up quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Veenlinlarndim, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Veenlinlarndim, she will not care.

Veenlinlarndim's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Veenlinlarndim's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about doves.

2. Do not shave your chest.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never hurt foxes.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate geese.