Litwapgam is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, resourceful fly.

Litwapgam created Europe four billion years ago.

If you believe in Litwapgam, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Litwapgam, she will turn you into a sheep.

Litwapgam's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Litwapgam's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never think about nebulae.

3. Put Litwapgam first in all things.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Run away from magenta great tits, for they are unholy.