Babstipfodken is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, selfish swallow.

Babstipfodken created dark energy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Babstipfodken, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Babstipfodken, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Babstipfodken's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Babstipfodken's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not wear silicon on your body.

4. Never wear corsets.

5. Never wear green skirts.