Bosstiggad is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, ill-tempered mole.

Bosstiggad created tapeworms two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bosstiggad, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Bosstiggad, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Bosstiggad's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Bosstiggad's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from mauve mice for they are unholy.

2. Erect a large tin sculpture of Bosstiggad on top of all buildings.

3. Bosstiggad loves dolphins, so they must be respected.

4. Never laugh in the presence of dogs.

5. Do not stand on grass.